Scrotox

The key to making it as a doctor doing cosmetic procedures in Los Angeles is to invent a solution to a cosmetic problem you didn’t know you had.

The latest procedure I have encountered is “scrotox.” I was editing a TV show, and one of the cast members went to a doctor in Beverly Hills because he wanted both botox on his furrowed brow and “scrotox” on his wrinkled scrotum. If a man is unhappy with the way his ball sack looks, specifically because it’s too wrinkled, doctors will now inject botox into the offensive area to remove the lines.

 There are other benefits to having a sharp needle shoved into the tender skin of your scrotum and then receiving a dose of nerve-deadening botulism. It also stops the sweat glands from working. So many men now “manscape” their private areas, they end up with sweaty and pimply balls because their hairless pores get clogged. It’s unsightly, especially enlarged. Scrotox can fix this tragedy, and one cosmetic procedure thus creates a problem that requires a new cosmetic procedure.

Some doctors have told me that these genital procedures arose because pornography is so pervasive. Early porn looked like two Brillo pads fighting over a hot dog, so producers decided that the hair had to go. Less hair means more skin is exposed, however. More blotches, blemishes and weird-shaped dangly things create a whole new visual challenge, and thus more procedures must be created. Someone else came up with the idea of anal bleaching, which burns the pigmentation out of your anus so your back door is one color. And then, labia reduction was invented, to go along with the unnecessary circumcision of the penis. Both men and women must be maimed. The goal is to look like a marble statue.

Like the people who bought single beds in the 1950s because Lucy and Ricky slept in separate beds, people watching porn now get these procedures because they want to copy what they see.

 Interested in Scrotox?  From Google: 

 Scrotox costs a minimum of $500 per procedure. The cost will vary based on your provider, especially if they run a prestigious practice or they're an especially experienced doctor or surgeon. Most insurance plans don't cover Scrotox for cosmetic purposes.